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Sunday, October 28, 2012

Atheistjustin Hates The New York Giants.

As I write this, my nipples are so hard with hatred that I could cut open Tom Coughlin's jugular with them. They have just successfully bullshitted their way to another victory. This time, Eli Manning (an autistic Southerner with retard strength) and a pack of black people, have managed to beat the Dallas Cowboys.

During this game, it has to be noted that the very beginning was paved with Giants touchdowns. This was not due to excellent play calling, nor due to the athleticism of incredible athletes. These early touchdowns were made via the folly of Cowboy's quarterback Tony Romo (also known as Tony Homo).

Anyway, as the second half unfolded, the New York Giants were fucked in the anus by the Cowboys as their vigor and new found courage brought them to lead the game by a single point. However, the Giants sucked the life out of all Dallas fans everywhere and devilishly found a way to win.

Within the last minute of the game, the score was 29-24 and Cowboys were in possession of the football. Romo amazingly threw a touchdown pass with Dez Bryant incredibly hoisting his body into the air and slinging the pigskin into his arms. But of course, since the Giants are nothing but blood sucking evil bastards, they had to ruin this fantastic moment in Football history and complain like little pussies.

The ruling was overturned as it was decided the touchdown was invalid. Why?

Because Dez Bryant's fingers were .5 inches outside of the end zone.

This is the bullshit of Giants football and it is one of the reasons why I hate them more than Spike Lee hates white people.

Please explain to me how this is fair in any way, shape, or form. I would love to understand how people could possibly convey the belief that due to the force of gravity and motion, that he could have not been in that situation.

I am more than positive that the Giants themselves have committed greater acts of bullshit touchdowns than the ones the Cowboys performed. And yet, they find themselves winning once again.

Do not be confused: I am an Eagles fan and will be until my dad dies. Why? Because he made me promise that I have to be an Eagles fan if I'm his son. I made this deal when I was 7, and 9 years later I can't back out. Oh well.

What bothers me most about the Giants is not the incredulously insensitive players themselves, but the fucking fans. Oh yes, you will find nobody more cocky, more sore-losing, more motherfucking ignorant, than Giant fans.

These little pieces of shit will never get over their love of their fucking team. And being a 7 year old kid in NJ, surrounded by Giants fans everywhere, it was hard growing up with everyone making fun of you. Oh yeah, that's fucking right, I was picked on by Giants fan as a small kid. This led to me neglecting football for a very long time and not coming back to it until just a few years ago.

Regardless, Giants fans will only speak when they are winning/have won. During the time when they were losing and when the Cowboys were scoring touchdowns, you couldn't see a single Giants fan tweeting or making any mention that they existed.

BUT OF COURSE, once the fuckers win by a bullshit call, they refuse to keep their mouths closed.

It is due to this ignorance and this disregard for sportsmanship and respect that I hate the Giants and all Giants fans.

But I must speak on the Eagles and clarify that I do not think my team better. Mike Vick is the worst quarterback to play for my team and Andy Reid is without a doubt the fattest, most Walrus-looking, most awful coach of all time. I can hardly watch a game without writhing in pain.
Please explain to me how my team is supposed to accomplish anything when they have a quarterback who can't throw, a coach that can't pick plays, and a running back that either fumbles or runs 3 yards.

My team is in the shit hole while the Giants continue to bullshit their way to more and more victories. Something had to be said and I'm happy to finally get this all off my chest. Now, I'm going to go cry and think about how nice it will be when Eli Manning's wife leaves him and when Tom Coughlin's old wrinkled balls finally hit the grave.

Angry Atheistjustin, out this bitch.

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I am Never Wrong. I am Awesome. I do NOT eat ass.